finally, vicent and i have the cake day. of course, gigi, jieyao, maggie, beth and abi r with us la... we played killer game. i look through others eyes to find what they r thinking. r u the killer? haha... we r together, we tell the message from our eyes' expression. i can not help smiling when i am thinking of u all.

        life will be a little bit different later on. do not need to have any feeling about it. God is faithful.

       

        I am really tired of hearing the "XXXXX, do it urself la." Rest a bit. Rest a bit.

        Love is from God. haha....   will be recharged soon.

        I woke up at 3 am today and went to coach at 4 am sharp. The sky was a little bit light so that I felt not that dangerous. It reminds me the feeling when I was walking in Pheonix Old City. But I am not that luck to see the rustic famer. I remember she was carring two baskets of cucumbers. I bought one and walking alone in the middle of the street alone. I took photos and saw the women washing clothes for their families alone the river. That is a piece of memory.

       At 6pm, finanly I came back from london. Hoping the Cezch's visa will come back soon.

       Prayers r always so powerful. wonder of wonders, mystery of mysteries, maricle of maricles.

       Dear BASIC, we will meet on Friday and Sundays. That makes me feel so warm as I am one of the member of LCCC and daughter of God.

things r getting well in the UK. i found a home stay. the landlady is so nice. i have to thank God. the boss in nottingham is so nice. i have to praise God.

i would not say:" oh! this is the last time u come to YAF。" but i did say it out. the one who was just next to me may be in the other part of the earth next moment. if  there is no everlasting love or life, how can i bear this. it was alway hard for me to let go, i just grip sth no matter who it belongs to. now, i start recognise that this is just a short seperat as we will meet sometime. hope is always there. at the sharp, i chrish u and that is enough. coz it is built in God!  ur kindness is in my heart! dear sisters.

      the atmosphere was peace, the meal was nice, the icecream is sweet and the soft drink was blended to be without gas by me (i like). thanks for brother's inviting and u two coming. we talked about our furture and i am so happy to share with u. the feeling is not from myself but from God, lightening and gentle. my english is not good enough to express my whole but at least u all can read it. know more about me and pls let me know more about u all as well. we r growing together and this is what God wants and i am enjoying. many thanks to u all and praise God.

         my mum rejected to come to visit me in summer. i did not ask her why. she said:" u r coming back  so that for me, no need  to go to the UK." i do feel shocked but a little bit cold. the business is not smooth this year, the burdern is heavier for my father. he is the only income source in my family. i am the one who consume most in my family. i am not saying i am too poor to suffer hunger and i do not need money now. they will never say no if i request. i am needed from their point of view. is it one kind of love expression?

         i like purple and finally changed the colour of my blog to be purple.

         finally, i admit i like purple. the fact is that i like purple. and i am facing it.

         i am all right, i  am not lose, i am fine, i am ok, i am happy.

         i like starts but can not see them recently. when will the rain stop?

不知道大家对母亲节有什么概念？我今日打电话回家，都没有说到一句话，妈妈就开始说我了，10多万出国就学英语？什么时候才学好啊？不工作，就知道浪费时间！是的，我用了不少钱，原来古代的千金，现在的我大概是万金了。我走啊走啊走啊走，母亲节，妈妈大概寂寞了，出去吃饭都是儿女在身边，我却在令外一个她所不知道的世界，花的是他们的血汗钱。我走啊走啊走啊走，我还要任性到什么时候呢？我没有说什么，就说拜拜了，她就挂了。我太贪婪了，有了完全的爱似乎还不足够，还想要身边的。我太自私了，总不分一点时间给别人。我太麻烦了，动不动就找人麻烦。不过最后总结，唔紧要，我要清除我的位置！

生命要完全，这个题目让我困惑不已，神啊！完全？我没有见过，没有碰过。不过，有人确实经历过，所以是存在的，也知道我们可以，靠着的不是我们自己，是住在我们当中的灵。人生有长度，你有多爱你自己？吃的是有益的东西吗？做的是健康的事情吗？对自己有益处吗？抽烟？醉酒？吸毒？不难发现，人会做出不是自己想做的事情，我们没有能力控制自己？！有时候啦！很多时候我们是被骗了。人生有宽度，你接触的周围的人，你爱吗？多少人发现爱邻居是多么的难。有的连爱自己爱的人都难。从心里面干涸。无论做得多好，都达不到周边的要求，是做错了？是不在乎了？是马虎了？真的达不到要求？很多时候我们是被骗了。生命的高度，站在一个什么地方看生命，无论多长，多广，都是局限于一个平面，不满足，疑惑，担忧，越走就越走不动。知觉都可以失去。唯有认识那完全的，才越来越高。这个生命就越来越具有空间。越清晰。生命就要活出生命。

 

其实是重价钱赎回来的，请不再要责怪了，都赦免了。周边尽是看不到的美丽，住在心里面那发光的，我了解多少呢？到我真的没有力了，爱不起了，请告诉我，让我悔，让我改，并且平安地呼吸着。天上的财宝，一定比地上的更加实在。识破谎言，丰盛生命。

 

魔鬼一号说：这世界没有神！撒旦说：你这笨蛋，世界那么美丽，奥妙，怎么会没有一位创造者呢？

魔鬼二号说：这世界有神，不过不会审判！撒旦说：你这傻呆，人天生本来就遗传了判断的本能，肯定是从创造者那里继承来的。

魔鬼三号理直气壮说：有神，也审判，不过你有很多时间！撒旦说：犀利！就让人知道自己有很多时间。

I am supposed to look forward to meeting Gerald F but I am really dead after finishing today' revision. He told us he will have to teach for 14 days. Non stop. How can he be so enthusiastic in teaching UK stream taxation. Gerald F, see you in the coming four days, my hard working teacher. Let's study together, let's have a good time together. Let me know that I will past the exam in June. I am hoping......

God i need you. I do not want to be crazy. I can not swallow your bread because i can not still do my best. I can not drink your wine because i felt i can not. God, help me. I am yours. Please! I am eagering you. My Lord.

Nothing happened this week! Everything is all right. Everyone is doing what they should be doing. There is no sadness in my life anymore.